Parenting: What do I do with defensiveness?
…your child’s attachment system can perceive your behavior as threatening, whether or not you intend to be threatening. Your best bet is to attend to that FIRST and FOREMOST. Then, you can more successfully accomplish the original goal of getting them to change a particular behavior.
Be your kid’s lawyer
Just as a lawyer would stand up for you in court, whether you did it or you didn’t, you stand up for your kid…You will sit beside them behind the table in front of the “judge” (whoever that may be) even if they did what they’re accused of.
Be your kid’s coach
Be your kid’s coach by helping them come up with creative solutions that work WITH how their brain works rather than against. Reduce your frustration and increase their self-confidence.
Be your kid’s…
I want to offer ideas on how we can support children. I am calling it “Be your kid’s...” This is because it’s a result of a few personal experiences in which I believe I sort of served a role for my kids that was helpful, but could easily be classified as something other than being their parent. For example, “Be your kid’s lawyer”…
