Counseling for Women After Divorce in virginia beach, va
Online therapy with Dr. emily fornwalt
Photo Credits: Valeris Nikitina; Unsplash
“i feel so alone.”
“i can’t do this by myself anymore.”
“what’s next?”
Everyone thinks the hard part of divorce is behind you.
But it still feels hard.
The kids are in bed, the house is clean, and you handled drop-off without crying in the parking lot. By every measure that matters to the people around you, you’re doing great.
But you’re not doing great post-divorce. You’re running on fumes and sheer stubbornness, and somewhere between the school pickup line and the 11 p.m. load of laundry, you stopped being able to tell the difference between holding it together and falling apart in slow motion.
You didn’t expect this part. You expected the divorce to be hard, and it was. But you thought once it was over, you’d feel lighter. Freer. Instead, the weight just shifted. Now it’s the weight of doing everything alone, of being both parents on your nights, of fielding questions from your kids that you don’t have answers to yet.
Read more about my work with divorced women.
You got really good at saying “I’m fine” during the divorce.
Everyone has an opinion about your divorce. Your mother thinks you gave up too easily. Your best friend thinks you should have left sooner. Your coworkers treat you like you’re fragile, or worse, like nothing happened at all.
So you’ve learned to edit. You give people the version of the story they can handle. You say “I’m doing well, all things considered,” and then you sit in your car for ten minutes before going inside because you need a moment where nobody needs anything from you.
Maybe you’ve noticed that your patience with the kids is thinner than it used to be. You snap at things that wouldn’t have bothered you a year ago, and then the guilt hits, because they didn’t ask for any of this either. Maybe you’re avoiding things you used to enjoy because they remind you of your old life, or because you simply don’t have the energy.
You’ve tried the self-help route–the books about “finding yourself after divorce,” the motivational Instagram accounts. Maybe you’ve even tried therapy, but it didn’t quite reach the thing that’s keeping you stuck. You don’t just need someone to listen. You need something to change. And finding the right therapist in Virginia Beach, or anywhere in Hampton Roads, can feel like one more exhausting task on a list that never ends.
Why you can’t just “think” your way through divorce
Your brain is stuck in survival mode. During the marriage, during the divorce itself, your nervous system learned to stay on high alert. It got used to scanning for conflict, bracing for the next hard conversation, protecting yourself and your kids from the fallout.
The divorce may be final, but your body didn’t get the memo. That’s why you tense up when his name appears on your phone, even if it’s just about soccer practice. That’s why you can’t relax on the couch at night even though the house is quiet. Whether you’re in Virginia Beach, Chesapeake, or Norfolk, your system is still running the old program, and no amount of deep breathing or positive thinking is going to override it, because this isn’t a thinking problem. It’s a body problem.
How we work together during all stages of separation and divorce
If you’ve tried coping strategies that helped for a while but didn’t get to the root of what’s driving the exhaustion and reactivity, there’s a reason. The patterns that are keeping you stuck aren’t just in your thinking. They’re in your body, in your nervous system, built during your marriage and still running your days.
That means paying attention to what happens in your body when we talk about something hard. It means slowing down in the moments you’d normally push through. It means learning to notice the difference between a real threat and an old reflex, so you can start responding to your life as it is now instead of bracing for a version of it that’s already over.
When those deeper patterns shift, you don’t just feel better in session. You feel it at home, in your patience with your kids, in your ability to make a decision without second-guessing it for days, in how you sleep.
Picture your life six months from now.
It’s a Friday evening and the kids are with their other parent. Instead of spending the night cycling through guilt and restlessness, you’re on the phone with a friend making plans for tomorrow. Real plans, not the kind you cancel at the last minute because you can’t muster the energy.
Your ex texts about a schedule change, and you read it, respond, and put your phone down. No surge of adrenaline. No twenty-minute mental argument. Just a text, handled.
Your daughter asks a question about the divorce that catches you off guard, and instead of freezing or deflecting, you answer her honestly and simply. She seems satisfied. You feel steady. Later that night, you realize that conversation would have wrecked you three months ago.
You’ve started saying no to things. The PTA committee you joined out of guilt. The extra hours at work you were using to avoid being alone with your thoughts. You’re not filling every minute anymore because the quiet doesn’t scare you the way it used to.
You went to a neighborhood cookout last weekend by yourself and it wasn’t awful. You talked to people, you laughed, you left when you wanted to. Nobody’s pity project. Just a woman having a decent Saturday.
You’re sleeping through the night more often than not. You’re making plans for next year, not just next week. And the voice in your head that used to say “you should have tried harder” has gotten quieter, replaced by something steadier: “you’re going to be okay.”
our sessions will be
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Collaborative: We will work together. Here’s at least one thing you’re not gonna be handling all on your own.
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Encouraging: Even if you can’t name them right now, I know you have strengths. You might roll your eyes when I point them out (I’ll allow it.).
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Real: I'll tell you the truth; you’ve got no time for therapy games where someone sounds like a cliché. You got that on your last Netflix binge.
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Fun: I can pretty much guarantee some laughs. You can demand more humor if needed, because I know you could use that break.
i’m Emily.
About dr. emily fornwalt
Therapist for women who are divorced in durham, nC
I'm a therapist licensed in Virginia (LPC; #0701013449), and I have a PhD in counseling from the University of North Carolina at Charlotte.
I work with women in Virginia Beach and across Virginia who are rebuilding after divorce, specifically women who are used to being competent, capable, and in control, and who are now in a season where those strengths aren’t quite enough to outrun what they’re feeling.
I have advanced training in attachment, the nervous system, and how relationships shape the brain, which means our work together goes deeper than traditional talk therapy while still feeling grounded and practical. I’m licensed in Tennessee, North Carolina, and Virginia and registered to provide telehealth in South Carolina, too.
If you’d like to learn more about me than can fit in a short blurb, please explore the link below.
Online therapy for women after divorce in virginia beach, va
I practice 100% via telehealth, which means you can do this work from anywhere in Virginia, whether that’s Virginia Beach, Norfolk, Chesapeake, or anywhere across Hampton Roads and beyond. No commute, no waiting room, no juggling one more thing in a schedule that’s already too full.
Sessions are 45 minutes at $225. I am an out-of-network provider.
You’ve carried divorce alone long enough. let’s lighten the load.
Schedule your first session using the link below
Complete intake paperwork (submit 24 hours before your appointment)
First session focus: Comprehensive assessment of your professional stress patterns, relationship dynamics, and therapy goals
Ongoing work: Weekly 45-minute sessions focusing on transforming your relationship with achievement and success
Schedule Your First Session:
Booking Page | Call/Text: 423.281.4098 | Email: emily@alignedcounseling.com
Other areas served via telehealth in Virginia:
Richmond • Norfolk • Chesapeake • Newport News • Hampton • Williamsburg • Arlington • Alexandria • Charlottesville • Fairfax
and all areas throughout Virginia.
Faqs
Do I need to live in Virginia Beach to work with you?
Nope. I practice 100% online, so you can work with me from anywhere in Virginia. Many of my clients are in the Hampton Roads area, including Virginia Beach, Norfolk, and Chesapeake, but I also see women across the state. All you need is a private space and a reliable internet connection.
How is your approach different from therapy I’ve tried before?
If you’ve tried therapy before and it felt like you were doing the work but nothing was shifting at a deeper level, there’s a reason for that. Sometimes the patterns keeping you stuck live in your body, not just your thoughts. I’m trained in AEDP (Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy) and interpersonal neurobiology, which means we work with your nervous system and emotional responses directly, not just the story you tell about them. In practical terms, that looks like slowing down in the moments where you’d normally push through, noticing what’s happening physically when a topic comes up, and letting your body process what your mind has been trying to manage alone. Clients often tell me they feel a difference within the first few sessions, not because I gave them a new tool, but because something shifted that they can’t quite put words to yet.
What does a session look like?
We meet via a secure video platform for 45 minutes. Some sessions we’ll focus on something specific that came up during the week, a co-parenting conflict, a decision you’re stuck on, a moment where old feelings got triggered. Other sessions we’ll go deeper into the patterns underneath those moments. I’ll check in with you about what’s happening in your body as we talk, and sometimes I’ll ask you to slow down and stay with a feeling rather than move past it. It’s not scripted, and I won’t give you homework unless it makes sense. The pace is yours.
How long does therapy take?
It depends on what you’re working through and what you want to get out of it. Some women come in during the acute crisis of divorce and work with me for several months. Others start therapy after the dust has settled and they realize they’re still carrying more than they want to. I don’t believe in keeping people in therapy longer than they need to be. We’ll talk openly about how things are going and when it makes sense to shift to less frequent sessions or wrap up.
I’m not sure I’m “divorced enough” for this. I’m still in the process.
You don’t need to be on the other side of it to start this work. Many of the women I see are still in the thick of it, navigating custody arrangements, dealing with attorneys, figuring out finances, and trying to hold themselves together while everything is in flux. In some ways, that’s when this work is most valuable, because the decisions you’re making right now will shape what your life looks like on the other side.
Logistics…
Here you can find detailed instructions on how to get started working together, how we proceed, and what you can expect.
First, important things to note:
I only work exclusively online and no in-person appointments are available.
I am not in network with any insurance plans and do not provide documentation for out-of-network reimbursement. There are many reasons for this, and I am happy to answer any questions you may have.
I offer primarily 45/50-minute sessions at a rate of $225 per session. If you’d like 60-minute sessions, please ask about my current availability. Initial sessions are 90 minutes and are $450.
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For intake sessions, I am available Mondays-Thursdays from 10:00-5:00. I am available for ongoing sessions Tuesdays-Thursdays from 10:00-5:00. I do not have evening or weekend availability. With regard to ongoing session availability, I cannot guarantee the availability of specific times or days based on openings you may see in my online calendar; availability there does indicate recurring availability. One of my values is to have some schedule flexibility for current clients so that when they need to make schedule adjustments, I am more likely to be able to do so. As such, an available slot does not equal the ability to put a regularly occurring appointment in that slot. If you have specific schedule needs, please reach out to confirm that I’d be able to accommodate them prior to completing an initial session.
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Once you have decided that you’d like to proceed with scheduling with me, you can mosey over and check out my lovely contact page. Here you can click the “Schedule your first session” button located at the center of the page. This will take you to my self-scheduling option. This allows you to look over my calendar and select a time that works for you. You can schedule up to 3 weeks in advance, as long as you are at least 3 days before the date you’d like to choose. It’s important to note that this first session will be a longer (90-minute) intake session.
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Scheduling in my online calendar will send a request for the specific appointment you’ve selected and reserve it for you. I typically confirm appointments within 24 hours, excluding weekends, holidays, and times I am out of the office on vacation. After I confirm your appointment, you will receive an email from Sessions Health.
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After you receive the confirmation, keep an eye out for three more emails. (I know! I bet you already get plenty, but I promise we just have to do this stuff once!) You will get an email welcoming you to therapy and outlining what you can expect; this will come directly from me. In addition, you will get one from Sessions Health and Aligned Counseling and Supervision; this contains your invitation to the client portal; this is where you will complete all required paperwork, which I need back 24 hours prior to our scheduled time in order to keep your appointment and avoid automatic cancellation. Finally, you will get an appointment “reminder” that will contain your telehealth link.
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Once you’ve set up portal access, you will have just three documents to review and sign. Please note that you can sign out and progress will be saved. You may want to set aside a little time to really read these over as they have a good bit of information relevant to our work together. Documents include: the informed consent, the HIPAA privacy practices, and information about my policies for electronic communication. Please let me know if you have any questions by emailing me. After signing those you will have some demographic questions and the opportunity to tell me just a bit about what brings you to therapy.
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Once you have set up your portal and I have a phone number, keep an eye out for a text from IvyPay. This is where you will enter your credit card information for me to charge for your sessions. I use IvyPay so that I don't have to personally handle any of your credit card information. IvyPay is a third-party HIPAA-compliant payment processor that takes care of it for me.
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Most clients are nervous the first time they attend counseling, even if it's just the first time with a new person. If you’ve never been before, you may not know what to expect and may have many TV or movie references for what it’s like. Trust me, they’re probably inaccurate. You may think you’re required to tell me ALL the things or that I will ask probing questions to get to the root of everything. That’s not what happens either. We will still be getting to know each other. In our first session, I will gather information about your concerns, the history, what you’d like to get out of counseling, and any other things you think are relevant. We will get a general idea of direction, but it will take us time to get to know each other. This one is a little different from the others, as a lot of our time will be spent getting me up to speed on your life and concerns. Things shift after that…stay tuned.
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It’s important to know that the completion of this initial session is not a guarantee of working together. If it ends up not working, I will do my best to help you find another provider to meet your needs. A few things that might result in us not working together include, but are not limited to:
You decide that we are not a good fit.
I am not the most appropriate person to help you with your specific needs.
You need a specific time slot and it is not available. (Avoid this by checking with me ahead of time!)
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Once you are ready to move forward, we will get your regular appointments set up. You will be scheduled for the same recurring time slot. These are either weekly or bi-weekly depending on your needs and availability. As we get to know each other during sessions, we will determine how we will know if things are getting better. I imagine that you have checked out who I am throughout my website, so you probably already know the following info. However, it’s probably worth saying again that I very much value talking explicitly with my clients about their experience of therapy with me, rather than assuming I know what they are feeling or experiencing, or what's best for them. This means I'll regularly ask you about what is going well in our therapy work together and if there's anything we should do differently. I am not a highly directive therapist, so our sessions will focus on what you need to get out of them each time. I provide some prompts about what we’ve been exploring or your general goals, but invite you to settle in and consider how we can take care of you in our session that day.
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When we get to a point where you’re feeling confident in what you’ve learned and are practicing, we can discuss reducing frequency (if you started weekly) or wrapping up altogether. There may be the option to reduce from bi-weekly to monthly sessions, but these are available only on a case-by-case basis, scheduled week-of, and cannot be guaranteed.
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Please feel free to email me! I usually respond within 24 hours Mondays-Fridays.
Book your session
Still Have Questions?
Contact Me
Please complete this form and I’ll be back in touch via email or text usually within 1 business day.
Call or Text
423.281.4089
emily@alignedcounseling.com
office mailing address
404 S Roan St., Johnson City, TN, 37604